Thursday, April 23, 2009

The Shepherd Boy

 
What manner of adversary art thou, Oh Cupid, mine newest enemy and cleaver of a heart now rent in two by love's dart unwanted? Fain wouldst I seek thy quiver spoilt and emptied of all implements of love's war, if but to liberate this shepherd boy from a wasting sickness wrought 'pon an unsuspecting and pure spirit. Content hath I been to drinketh in Nature's beauty and surfeit mine pining soul with Her sufficient bounties. She and she alone hath been, to present, sufficient food for all mine youthful cravings and whate'er further necessity wouldst, some elusive day, 'come enjoined upon this pitiable naif. Now, because of thee, despised one, mine once simple eye hath become darkened. The Serpent hath coiled 'round, he holdeth tight fast and letteth flow his venom slow and insuperable till mine full allegiance be guaranteed. That dear and innocent tender of the fold abideth no more. Thy darts, Cupid, art they claddeth in lead or gold?
 
O cunning and ruthless one, I hath become weary of a desire heretofore unknown. I am sickened at mine very center. Flesh and resolve once resistant to sin's temptation art now troubled by inconvenient stirrings. They rumbleth deep within a frame of roiling and burning blood that seeketh assuagement.
 
Come closer, dear Cupid. I speaketh only in jest as I truly do love thee. Before this febrile brow breaketh its hold, however, couldst I very well clippeth thy wings if 'pon thy cursed neck I shouldst fall. Love's sweet suffering hath rendered an innocent child mad and unaccountable for his present state of amorous intoxication.
 
I prithee, letteth the Immortals rendereth righteous judgment on mine behalf shouldst this madness leadeth to Cupid's demise by mine hand ...

Sunday, April 12, 2009

Letters From the Subconscious


My dearest love, Cupid:
 
How I long to have you return to my side and smile your cherubic smile upon me. It has been too long that I have languished over love's dream unfulfilled. My prim and proper family suspect that there is a change in my spirit; they say that the brightening of my eyes and the upturn of the corners of my mouth are becoming all too frequent. They are perplexed that my former solemn, taciturn ways have blossomed most prodigiously into a riot of springtime colour and cheer. The protracted winter of my discontent has vaporized and can afflict no more.
 
Accordingly, my family's puritanical mores are so deeply and long entrenched that one's breaking free from such tyrannical bondage of body and soul seems a revolutionary act. Well, I say fie on the whole lot of them! You, sweet and delectable Eros, are no villain, no embodiment of mere carnal pleasure. You are a releaser, a liberator, a sweet saviour of this despairing maid whose shriveled spirit you have revivified by your glance, your touch, your kiss ...
 
I know you are true, that I am your only one. Please hasten into my presence and cherish my society as none other. The French window shall, as ever, remain open as upon wings of desire you alight once more upon my chamber floor.
 
An Eros by any other name is still a Rose ...
 
Your Spectre of the Rose
 
 
 
Ever dear and splendid Narcissus,
 
I once gazed with love upon your reflected image and yearn for that day when ne'er again shall we part company. When last you left my side, I was seized with an extraordinary compulsion to run after you and beg you stay and console me. I am not accustomed to such aloneness that has been enjoined upon me.
 
Since that forced separation, that damnable schism, I have reeled with uncertainty and self-doubt as to who truly I am. I fear that, deep down, I am little more than a shallow, empty nothing. Where shall I find a deepness of soul, a true and abiding reason for my existence if not with you, for you? There would appear no possibility of success were I to continue on in this fashion of incompleteness.
 
It was you, not I, who demanded liberation from the confines of our conjoined spirit and soul.  Why, pray, the blind necessity of searching out foreign waters to cast your eyes, my eyes, on an image too well and oft observed? Have you not considered restraint? A diversion centering on others? Perhaps a little less self-absorption?
 
I long for your return, knitted back in place where you belong, to terminate once and for always this useless dichotomy of body, soul, spirit. Granted, I acceded to your pleas for personal liberty, but can you truly say that you are the happier lad for seeking your reflection without my sage eye upon you?
 
Please reflect, not so much upon the physical aspect of youth's beauty, but that which runs deep and true. Eternal youth and ageless outward beauty are but a myth ... a paperwhite, though lovely, is but a passing springtime fancy.
 
It cannot be forced beyond....
 
Hermes has promised swift delivery of this missive to you, my better half ...
 
Love eternally,
 
Narcissus

Monday, March 2, 2009

The Letter


Scrubbing mindlessly away at the kettle's burnt-soup-encrusted bottom, Robin Metier was mentally focusing on his fingers otherwise gainfully employed, zooming in ascent and descent upon his Yahama keyboard. Arpeggios. Scales. Particularly in f-sharp minor, b-minor and c-sharp major. The big day - November 12 - was rapidly approaching, and that faster in Robin's mind than the clock's hands could reasonably wind forward.

The stocky teen was grateful that Aunt Mabel employed his mundane talents as official pot scrubber at her Pine Cone Cafe in the little mountain community of Gold Peak. Some needed cash and three squares a day. In a few more days Robin would be mounting the Peerless Stage, heading off to The City by the Bay to do his thing, so to speak, on the piano. He was happy with the Yamaha keyboard he had saved for and purchased with his earnings. The thought of playing on a concert grand at The Ortega Institute, however, was sufficient impetus to keep his spirits high as he plowed through stacks of dinner plates, cups, saucers and, of course, pots, pans and kettles. The hot water was music to his played-out digits.


NOVEMBER 12:

Robin and nine other aspiring pianists each await his/her turn at the concert grand. Such waiting is always an excruciatingly painful exercise, not, of course, in proper piano technique, but in controlling one's nerves. Not running to the nearest toilet and losing one's breakfast.

At Last! First audition and, afterward, a polite thank you, we (the faculty) will be in touch. Another rendition of the ubiquitous Moonlight Sonata and a comment of "well done, Miss Steiner." Nods of approval. Thank yous. Why Robin has ended up candidate number 10, the nervous young man has no idea. "Mr. Metier ... if you please...."

Robin reverently approaches the Bosendorfer Imperial Grand, sits upon the cushioned bench and adjusts the knobs. Just the correct height. Right foot placed firmly upon the damper pedal, left poised upon the sostenuto. Hands in readiness, set to descend upon the usual 88 as well as those 9 extra coils of thunder in the bass that Robin shall certainly hammer upon for Olivier's Essay in F-sharp Minor. Upon completing the fire and brimstone of the opening section, the daring but now quieter and contemplative musician begins to ply his way through the transparent, sparkling waters of the essay as shore appears on the musical horizon.

As Robin's hands lift from the final chord cluster and his foot from the damper pedal, the rounded sonorities continue to resonate darkly eerie through the hall. Then silence. If there had been meant a pin to drop at this moment, well....

The young man, trembling with expectation over any scrap of approval or disapproval, waits a few moments more ... silence. Deafening silence....

Unable to cope with both the exhaustion and apparent lack of recognition for his rather well turned out performance, an overwrought Robin eyes the nearest exit and runs off the stage.


Back at the hotel room whose seediness Robin had endured all too long, he packed up his scant clothing and his manuscripts, took one last look in the dirty mirror by the door, and sneered at his reflection, "Loser!"

At the desk, Robin paid up the balance due and turned in his key. After a polite but empty thank you to the clerk, the hollow shell turned on his heel and exited the decaying lobby. As he shuffled along, young Mr. Metier looked cheerlessly upon the dreary edifices holding onto dear life for whatever crazy reasons and wondered about his own. Passing him by were tired men and women off to necessary but despised jobs, cranky children making their way to reading, writing and 'rithmetic. And a briskly trotting courier .... A few moments more and Robin would be on board the bus for home. He knew that dear old Aunt Mabel would welcome him home regardless.

Three squares a day ...

The youthful, rosy-cheeked courier bustled into Newbury Arms and handed the clerk a letter from Dr. Arthur Sewell, The Ortega Institute. Having no forwarding address for Mr. Robin Metier, the indifferent clerk marked boldly upon the envelope face, RETURN TO SENDER.

Dear Mr. Metier,

I hope you will forgive the jury the stunned silence that met the conclusion of your bravura performance of Essay. You see, Professor Olivier is one of our composers in residence at The Ortega Institute and he returned unexpectedly from an overseas tour. He popped in minutes before you had commenced playing and was sitting at the rear of the concert hall. While you were performing, he sent word for me to see him immediately.

As we sat enthralled, Professor Olivier said over and over under his breath, "Yes, yes ... he's the one!" Puzzled over what was going on, the remaining judges came to the rear of the auditorium, saw who was sitting there with me, and simply remained to enjoy your exquisitely rendered music from a better vantage point both acoustically and visually. Upon your completion of Essay, we were simply too overwhelmed with emotion to respond. Scarcely professional, I admit, but I respectfully request that you endeavor to understand our lack of clear reasoning. You truly possess that indefinable but nonetheless much sought charisma of the keys. One has it or one hasn't.

May this letter find you as soon as possible! Please see instructions below as to our next meeting with you. Professor Olivier is most anxious to meet you as well as to discuss your promising future.

Sincerely,

Dr. Arthur Sewell


Saturday, February 28, 2009

Quarrel With a Cross Beau

 
A disquieted, quivering Paolo Pulzone was admiring from afar the lovely Anna Archer, who was standing stock still upon the hillock, the wind gently giving rise to the flowing blond tresses of the lass. It was all Paolo could do to bridle his conflicting emotions and not cast aspersions upon the guileless and fletching Anna.
 
She had had a quarrel with her beau, now cross, but wished not to prod the excitable Pulzone to rack and ruin by releasing further invective upon his head. The strings of his heart were already all atwang; the broad headed bowyer needed no further triggers setting him off-target. He had reached his nocking point and all his levers were soon to become unhinged.
 
"Verretto verretto non quadrello dardo," mused the spineless and cross beau, as he stropped on his stirrups and headed home.

Thursday, February 26, 2009

The Desert Reigns


I embark upon a mind's desert journey in order to survey a wilderness landscape far from the grasp of Winter's thrall upon my captive self. Only then may I perceive the sublime beauty and precious rarity of water. Otherwise, the deluge that, in reality, engulfs, drowns a community, leaves me ironically unappreciative of heaven's bounty.

The sky is a hot, blazing azure that permits no trace of cloud and moisture. Verboten, likewise, is all trace of verga. As night settles in and scorching becomes a more tolerable hot-enough, creatures of the night scurry forth and do what instinct says do. Eerily subdued cries of the jackal send chills up and down a spine long since unaccustomed to frissons in so jaded a host. My footfalls upon the cooling sands crunch down, creating eddies of swirling grains that demand entry into my boots. This is what I sense, yet there is no sound. None.

The temple I seek is just ahead. Several meters more and I shall touch its gleaming walls of glass, porcelain and adamantine steel. A mere few steps more. There it is ... through a moonlit, shimmering haze I glimpse faith's reward of rest and refreshment for a hope eternally held. Soon I shall enter its gates ...

A cold wind passes over me and startles me into wakefulness. I open my eyes to reality and ... home.

Day 39 of rain.

 

Wednesday, February 25, 2009

The Hot Bath

Melvin was a shower kind of guy his entire life. He was simply too preoccupied with other matters of importance to allow himself the luxury of a nice hot bath. Not that the idea didn't appeal, however. Given the dousing nature of the overhead spray, Mel usually was anxious to exit the pummeling jet of H2O, hastily dry off and settle back into his interrupted chain smoking of Lucky Strike cigarettes. After all, L.S.M.F.T. - Lucky Strike means fine tobacco! He knew the tobacco was toasted, which made his deep drags all the tastier.

Time passed and Melvin retired from the plant. He enjoyed his newfound freedom and spending more time with his beloved wife, Jean. He had always been close to his son and daughter who, now grown and with children of their own, lived nearby and frequented the old homestead, regaled with Mom's gourmet meals and Dad's corny jokes. As the saying goes, "a good time was had by all."

When the dust had settled, so to speak, Jean returned to her projects and the usual routine of running the household. Melvin, after a little of this, that and the other, liked to call it a day (even if the day was hardly over) and slip upstairs into the guest bath. There was not only a shower but also a big and comfortable bathtub ... really comfortable, where you can actually lie back and soak, NOT the fiberglass jobs with a straight back and so short that even a pygmy has to draw up his knees to wedge himself in. The bonus feature was that now Melvin could soak and smoke and luxuriate in silky bubbles. Every day.

The old gent enjoyed this simple luxury not only for the simple pleasure it afforded him, but it seemed that, increasingly, he needed the therapeutic benefits of the hot water. He was feeling some deep-seated soreness that he couldn't account for. He hadn't been working all that strenuously in the garden and he really did get plenty of sleep at night, not to mention a few winks here and there throughout the day. Oh well, I always feel better once I'm out, Melvin thought to himself while lighting up another Lucky Strike. Think I'll spend a little while longer ... too soon to pull the plug ...

At the local hospital, Melvin is on life support. His son and daughter are huddled in a corner with their teary mother, talking to Melvin's doctor. They have to decide, given the old man's terminal condition, what to do at this juncture.

Comatose, and quite unfluttered over what has been tearing his family apart for the last several days, Melvin is enjoying his toasted tobacco and his hot bath. Quite out of the blue and a shock to all those in the room, Melvin lets out softly but distinctly, "Too soon to pull the plug...."

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

Earl Grey

For the time being Les seemed condemned to surround himself with loud people, forgetfulness and Earl Grey.

Under normal circumstances, Lester Brockle-Bank liked his quietude strong and full-flavored, like his tea; however, lately, his typical reclusive manner had ceded to an inordinate need for the society of local rustics rather dissimilar from him in temperament. In deep and searing pain over the loss of Lottie, this morose lonely heart found an unlikely solace in the boisterous tea houses of North Plimpton-by-the-Sea.

He was not alone there in drowning his sorrow, which he did with the intensity of Bergamot as well as with the help of many a willing, well-upholstered tea cozy.

Tuesday, February 17, 2009

And a Child Shall Lead Them ...

From the moment Stan came into our lives twenty-three years ago, my parents and I have been unwittingly elevated to an unusual level of awareness; trifles that ordinarily go quite unnoticed came unexpectedly into sharp relief. A mental and spiritual acuity gradually began to develop within the three of us, and its focus was the new arrival. This child, as the song goes, came into the world in the usual way. Nevertheless, had the scenario that unfolded over the last two decades been staged within the sacred theatre of Biblical antiquity, this unusual child, like the infant Samuel, would have been dedicated unto the LORD.

Stan was always a happy baby, and to say that he was just another cute little boy, well … more of that later. I mentioned that our level of awareness became keener because of Stan. An especially memorable period was when elderly Aunt Rose came to stay with us for a spell after her husband, our Uncle Angelo, had died. His death was sudden and caused my family and Aunt Rose, in particular, much grief. Stan was about four or five at the time, I believe, and I - the typical, self-absorbed teenager - was in my early teens.

One day, like any other (well, almost), Aunt Rose was staring out the window, which was becoming part of her daily routine. The sadness in the air was especially palpable that afternoon; it was raining a melancholy and indifferent sort of drizzle. A lusty, wind-driven downpour would have been preferable under these distressing circumstances. The old darling’s gloom hung about us like a bad suit of clothes. The stillness was shattered, however, when she, totally out of the blue and without warning, burst into tears and sobbed with abandon. Mom ran into the living room to see what had happened and I stood there like a statue. What does a teenage guy know about comforting the bereaved? I knew some Scripture but hadn’t a clue how to wring any practical comfort from the Good Book.

Mom knelt down by Aunt Rose and talked soothingly to her, and, after a few moments, the old lady appeared to calm down. Mom must have felt satisfied that Aunt Rose was all right, so she headed back to the kitchen to brew my great aunt a pot of restoring tea. While my mother’s aunt was recovering and I was standing in stunned silence at this most awkward of moments, Stan walked into the room and went directly to Aunt Rose. I had the presence of mind to halt this intrusion of her privacy and made for my little brother’s arm. Before I could grab hold and jerk him away, he abruptly turned his head toward me and gave me a look that could kill at twenty paces. I dropped back, utterly speechless. He turned back toward his elderly, great aunt whose attention he had already captured. Her face was the usual blank, only more so, if you get my drift.

My mother returned to the living room, smiling gently in our general direction, carrying a tray crowned with a silver tea service and laden with the home-baked goodies she is locally famous for. As she set down the tray on the coffee table, Stan tugged at the ottoman adjacent to the threadbare, old wingback that Aunt Rose had made her permanent home. Once it was in place before her, the little fellow perched upon it and reached out for her wizened left hand with his right. Young and fresh clasping the ancient and scarcely living. Do you remember the old saying, “Out of the mouths of babes”? Stan subsequently gave it a new meaning, a meaning that changed our lives.

After a few moments looking out the picture window, Stan gazed upward toward Aunt Rose, and, with a look of slight bemusement, she returned a gaze of her own. Mom and I were standing at a "respectful" distance to the side and saw the little guy’s lips begin to move. Given our position relative to this seated odd couple, who were occupying each other’s attention, we couldn’t read Stan’s lips. The reason I mention that is because he was talking to his great aunt so softly that neither my mother nor I had a clue what deal was being clinched. With her hand still firmly in his own, Stan rose and shot a look out the window. It had stopped raining, much to my surprise. I have no idea why I should be surprised or not surprised at such a non-event. Perhaps it was because the clouds were breaking up and the sun was warming up the last shreds of so forlorn a day. My moment of reverie was broken when I realized that the pair was at the front door, yet hand-in-hand. With his left hand Stan grabbed hold of the old brass knob, twisted it and pulled a slightly confused but willing captive through the portal. Aunt Rose was not the only person in this diminutive boy’s thrall.

Aunt Rose and Stan were outside for some time walking about the garden, looking at the saturated yet glistening shrubs that were catching the last rays of a Sol rather belated in arriving. Better late than never. Geese were flying high above the treetops, honking jubilantly at their crepuscular escape through the darkening skies. I seriously believe they were shouting down a riotous salute to Stan, who was waving enthusiastically at them with his free hand. Aunt Rose was looking upward and shielding her eyes against the fading sunlight with her right hand. Mom and I, forgetting totally about time and all practical concerns, were still at the window when that odd couple traipsed through the front door. I’ll never forget what I saw next.

The old lady was somehow transformed: she was actually smiling and had a somewhat girlish gaiety about her. She was chatting away about what a beautiful day it was and, by golly, we’re hungry! Let’s eat! She took off her shoes – they were wet and muddy – and tossed them in the corner with all the other detritus of country living. After pushing back several wisps of unruly gray from her brow, she marched resolutely into the kitchen, grabbed and put on an apron and started fussing about like she owned the place. My mother and I could only look at each other blankly.

Stan had repaired to a corner of the living room and was sitting cross-legged on the floor, his nose in a book ...

Friday, January 9, 2009

The Further Adventures of Sir Walter Mitty


Ta-pocketa-pocketa-pocketa-pocketa revved the Rolls-Royce gas turbine bypass turbofan aero-engine as Sir Walter Mitty prepared for takeoff ... The comely cockpit stewardess, a certain Babette De Sheer, plied her sumptuous way to Sir Walter's seated, muscled side and offered him a tall, cold one: a frosty Lalique of milk, shaken, not stirred ...

"Walter ... Walter! What are you doing? You've just spilled your tumbler of milk all over my new linen tablecloth!"

"De Sheer, De Sheer," muttered a dazed Walter, one foot still in the Vickers VC10 cockpit, the other wrapped around a Carolina Cottage Prairie dining chair in his mother's over-upholstered dining room.

"What ever is that you're burbling, Walter?" demanded Mother Mitty, not exactly your garden-variety shrew though her maiden name, ironically enough, was Harridan.

"De Sheer, er, uh ... Dis here is some mess I've created, Mother - so sorry!" Walter declared, by now fully disentangled from the allure and heavy parfum of Babette.

"I really want you to see Dr. Bothlewaite, Walter. I'm going to call him right now. Don't you go wandering off, do you understand?"

"Yes, Mother," Walter demurred, looking out the large bay window at his wild blue yonder.



Sir Walter had single-handedly taken out an entire contingent of the French West African rebel guerillan force, much to the relief and, this writer daresays, astonishment of the true French Foreign Legion. Back to the barracks, the radiant Brigadier General was hoisted onto the shoulders of soldiers jubilant at their hero's exploits; the canteen cooks, alerted to the soon re-entry of the swarming smarmy army, hastily fried up a mess of especial pain roti aux oeufs a la francaise for the famished warriors.

"Thank you, my fellow comrades," Sir Walter intoned, "but it's to you that I raise this pitcher of syrup in hearty salute ..."

"Walter!" Mother Mitty shrilled. "How was the French Toast? Did you clean up after yourself? Is that syrup on your chin??



"Walter, dear, I'm having you return the watering can to Framistanyl Mercantile. The spout holes are much too small and I haven't the entire afternoon to wile away watering my ageratum. Please hook up the new rubber garden hose to the rear bib and water my bed for me. There's a good lad," Mother Mitty carried on as Walter stared vacantly into his tiresome mother's eyes.

On the other hand - the one not engaged with the careful unwinding of the rather stiffish 50 feet of rubber tubing - Walter saw his true reflection all too clearly in the bay window, dressed for the Kalahari safari for which the lordly Earl Smedley Snaithe-Witherswright had professionally engaged him. Pith helmet surely set at a jaunty angle atop the handsome and square-jawed head, a rakish Sir Walter led the desert-bound expedition into the Maw of Hell.


"I say, Wally, quite a little junket we've set out upon, eh?" quipped the Earl.

"Ah, right you are, Smeds, old chap," Sir Walter replied, drawing steadily but hugely upon his Meerschaum. "The Popa Falls will afford us the opportunity to view the occelated spiny eel in its natural habitat, a rare but worth-the-effort endeavour, if we're clever."

"Mastacembelus vanderwaali, I must confess, has always been a favourite of mine and little Doxie." Pausing momentarily, as if in a deep and impenetrable thought process, all the while knitting up a considerable mass of eyebrows, the consternated Sir Smeds then demanded, with no little perplexed curiosity, "How do you mean, 'if we're clever'?"

"The masta," Wally put in, "is an elusive little devil, intent against any and all capture forthwith by man or beast. It is a little known fact that ..."

Before the expert anguilliformist/herpetologist could spew further dusty data on Class Osteichthyes, Dusilla Mambarta, trusted guide and scout to the party, interjected with barely disguised rapture, arms excitedly flailing about,

"Bwana, mon petit homme important, Popa falling waters we find her! Come, follow!"

Wasting no time and, surely with no further ado or adon't, the expedition ploughed a massive furrow forward, the two aristocrats in the vanguard.

Fully wound down the precipitous escarpment, both the savage and the cosmopolitan mottled crew arrived at the vale of La Grande Popa. There, in the capacious catch-basin of the thundering cascade, shone like the Jewels of the Blessed Madonna the venerable, the sacred occelated MASTA.

Of course, given the uber superstitious character of those indigenous to the Kalahari Alluvial Delta, the natives fell of one accord to their collective knee, heads bowed in the deepest and most pious reverence to the spiny incarnation of their slimy deity. Though nominal and straitlaced Anglicans, the Sir and the Earl, nevertheless, could not help but let fly a single half-choked sob betwixt themselves.

The simple, besotted jungle folk refused to proceed further, daring not to tread upon sacred ground. Not to be deterred by such sodden malarkey, Sir Walter - solo - walked resolutely toward the hallowed waters. Once upon the basin and its roiling, sparkling vapors, Sir Walter removed his regimental trappings, rolled up and fastened his right blouse sleeve, and, with nary a wince, plunged his hand into the maelstrom.

In a mere moment he pulled out his submerged limb, and there - amid the screams and wails of the pagan laity - writhed most ferociously the revered booty ... slashing ... thrashing ... wriggling to set itself free....


"Walter Mitty!!! What have you done to my bed!!!???" bellowed an enraged Mrs. Mitty, as she gasped in horror as her seemingly entranced son, Walter, was fighting an out-of-control rubber hose under high pressure, water pummeling her silken bed comforter through an open bedroom window.